I didn't stand up for bullshit punishments
even as a kid i understood injustice and i'd get in teacher's faces over shit
and I NEVER let them pull the "you don't understand 'cause you're a kid" bullshit
I'd say something like "you're only saying that because you don't have a real answer. if you did you'd actually explain it and teach like a teacher is supposed to do"
if I failed my dad would always finish the job for me
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Started lifting some time in 2008. It's been a big part of my life since. I like getting stronger, making progress, breaking through barriers, challenging myself physically, all that sort of thing. Every day, I'm physically stronger and more capable than the day before.
And at the same time, I'm mentally tougher and have more perseverence than I've ever had. I'm less critical and more positive and constructive than I used to be. I have a more open mind and I've questioned my own beliefs while honing the beliefs and ideas that stick.
I challenge myself. I actively try to learn as much as I can about everything. I've developed eclectic tastes in various things and I think it's made me a more interesting and unique person. I like that I'm a powerlifter who digs reading about theoretical physics (seriously, it's cool stuff). I like being a bona-fide thrash-metal guitarist who loves the Pixies and the Eagles and John Coltrane. I try really, really hard and in most ways, I genuinely like the human being I've become.
But other people seems not to share my opinion. Oddly, I had a lot of friends in high school when I was still a big fat miserable fuck. Over the last few years, I've lost contact with most of those people for a variety of (amicable) reasons and I haven't made any friends to replace them. I used to feel a sense of belonging. Even if it was to an arbitrary subset, I used to identify with people.
In September, I went back to school in no small part because at work I felt surrounded by very dull people who seem content to live in painfully small worlds. Unfortunately, I found the only difference between co-workers and the college students I'm around now is the latter's self-importance and sense of entitlement. I find myself drained and disheartened by every interaction with them.
I don't think I'm lacking in social skills. I can be fun and flippant and make casual conversation. I can flirt shamelessly with pretty girls and they seem to dig it. But it's not satisfying interaction. I know that if I act like "me", if I even brushed against topics that are significant to me in conversation, if I stray briefly from my 100% self-conscious monitoring, I'm looked at like a sociopath.
I know that relationships are a give-and-take situation; I have no issue with that. But it seems for all the world like I've got a choice to either act like myself and be isolated or suppress the person I like being and feel isolated.
It's a very discouraging situation.
And at the same time, I'm mentally tougher and have more perseverence than I've ever had. I'm less critical and more positive and constructive than I used to be. I have a more open mind and I've questioned my own beliefs while honing the beliefs and ideas that stick.
I challenge myself. I actively try to learn as much as I can about everything. I've developed eclectic tastes in various things and I think it's made me a more interesting and unique person. I like that I'm a powerlifter who digs reading about theoretical physics (seriously, it's cool stuff). I like being a bona-fide thrash-metal guitarist who loves the Pixies and the Eagles and John Coltrane. I try really, really hard and in most ways, I genuinely like the human being I've become.
But other people seems not to share my opinion. Oddly, I had a lot of friends in high school when I was still a big fat miserable fuck. Over the last few years, I've lost contact with most of those people for a variety of (amicable) reasons and I haven't made any friends to replace them. I used to feel a sense of belonging. Even if it was to an arbitrary subset, I used to identify with people.
In September, I went back to school in no small part because at work I felt surrounded by very dull people who seem content to live in painfully small worlds. Unfortunately, I found the only difference between co-workers and the college students I'm around now is the latter's self-importance and sense of entitlement. I find myself drained and disheartened by every interaction with them.
I don't think I'm lacking in social skills. I can be fun and flippant and make casual conversation. I can flirt shamelessly with pretty girls and they seem to dig it. But it's not satisfying interaction. I know that if I act like "me", if I even brushed against topics that are significant to me in conversation, if I stray briefly from my 100% self-conscious monitoring, I'm looked at like a sociopath.
I know that relationships are a give-and-take situation; I have no issue with that. But it seems for all the world like I've got a choice to either act like myself and be isolated or suppress the person I like being and feel isolated.
It's a very discouraging situation.
Monday, February 14, 2011
Are you an unhappy person? Try some of these things to make you happier. WoT
(Note I typed this up a while ago and now that I'm rewriting it, I know I'm missing a few things. This list will probably be updated.)
Let me premise this by saying all of this information is based on personal experience, whether by careful observation of myself or of others.
I'm one of the happiest people I know. I feel happy nearly all the time regardless of the situation. I try to stick to the following (in no particular order):
-DON'T STRESS - Stress sucks. If you're getting caught up in something, take a step back, take a breath, and think of an organized way to handle the situation. This also involves avoiding situations which could cause you potential stress. AVOID procrastination at all costs! It adds up to subtle stress when you don't even realize it, and most often stress can make you unhappy. Prioritize your life appropriately. Is eating that hamburger worth the 5 minutes of bliss even though it makes you late to your interview for a job that could make you much happier? Reduce stress further by planning out what you have to do in order of priority and then actually do it.
-EXERCISE - Seriously. Do this. I've had some bummed out days and then I remind myself that if I head out for a run or go lift at the gym I'll feel significantly better. And I do. Incapable of exercising? Unless you're a quadriplegic, or have some other incapacitating disorder, you're not. Get out and MOVE.
-SLEEP - This is FUNDAMENTAL. I don't even like sleeping that much, but I don't like *anything* if I don't get my sleep. Not only am I less happy on days when I sleep less than 7 hours, but I feel so sluggish, my decision making is impacted as well as my focus, and my memory isn't that great. Sleep 8+ hours as often as you can. You'll feel more aware during the day, more energized, and happier. Most importantly, DO NOT get less than 7 hours of sleep for many days in a row. You'll feel like utter shit, and even after a night of good sleep, you may not even feel that great the next day until you get another night of good sleep. Try to keep a healthy sleep pattern and try to keep it consistent. To you non-sleepers, I recommend this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xmgNLrvW-94 (Part of a 2 part series, yes it's not very exciting)
Do you take prescription drugs for sleep? STOP! The health risks for excessive use of sleep aid etc can be detrimental. Try to get yourself as relaxed as possible before going to bed and clear your mind. Exercising during the day can allow you to fall asleep faster and have a more fulfilling sleep.
-AVOID EXCESSIVE DRUGS - When you get high you feel *great* don't you? Understandable. When you get high multiple times a day (or even multiple times a week) ask yourself if it legitimately makes you happy. But then ask yourself if you even remember all the shit you do, and if the next day you feel your fullest. Do you think you get great high sleep? You don't if you get high before going to bed consecutively each night. Your REM sleep is impacted which makes for a less fulfilling sleep and you'll be less aware during the next day which can also have a negative effect on your happiness. This is really difficult to see from your own perspective unless you take a step back and view your life from an outside perspective. Are you thinking clearly in stoner mode? No. Pot makes you think you're thinking clearly. It also makes you think you're good at things when really the tasks at hand would be performed more quickly and efficiently when you're sober. We've all heard "Dude, i'm so much better at that shit when I'm high!" No. Also avoid excessive drinking. I think this one is obvious. Alcohol doesn't necessarily make you happy, it simply alters your state of perception and magnifies a few emotions. Of course it's possible to be happy while under the influence of alcohol, but keep your drinking limited and infrequent. Avoid hard drugs with addictive properties such as coke, meth, and heroin. This is obvious. Avoid overuse of prescription drugs. Drugs such as these also have addictive properties and can be potentially problematic in the future (therefore impacting your happiness). VERY few of you have legitimate "illnesses" if you will, which require you to have prescription drugs. Try your best to avoid them. As for cigarettes, if you must, keep them infrequent. Not only does it give you a nicer buzz if you're not a smoker, but it's overall better for your health, and by extension, your future happiness. We've all heard about the risks of smoking and how it's not good for you. To you smokers who may want to quit, I recommend this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TL2Vh7goJc
-DON'T GIVE A FUCK - Don't take this too literally. What it means to say is "Don't take the opinions of others too critically." Is someone shitting on your day and it's bumming you out? Remove them from your life, and push them out of your mind. This is quite a difficult skill to possess, but a very helpful one. The ability to block out certain things that bother you has many strengths and few weaknesses. It allows you to strengthen the other points in your life that make you happy while removing the points in your life that make you unhappy.
-DO THINGS - Do you sit around all day playing WoW? Are you *legitimately* happy doing that? If you are, well then continue doing so. If not, get the fuck out of your house and go places. Meet people. See things. Don't have money? Get a job so you can do things. Mixing up your life is one way to make it significantly more exciting and it will yield more happiness.
-LIVE A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE - Stay hydrated; drink multiple cups of water each day. In time you will be able to feel what it’s like to be hydrated. Drinking water helps keep you alert and aware and it’s good for your body. Eat healthy. Just like what is mentioned below, in the extreme case in the movie SuperSize me, excessive consumption of fatty foods can lead to depression. It’s a good idea to take a multivitamin and you can get a shitload of the best multivitamins from cosco (a study found that they have the best) for very cheap. Eat breakfast. Eating a mix of fruits and vegetables amongst your diet can be greatly helpful. “Bananas have more Vitamin B6 than any other fresh fruit and are regarded as an excellent source of this vitamin. Eating bananas helps to keep serotonin levels high, which will keep you in good spirits.” - http://www.medkb.com. Keep good hygiene! Not only will being clean (hopefully) give you a more clean feel-good feeling, but it will make you a more approachable person.
-GET MOTIVATED - Always try to have a goal in mind. Whether it’s writing out a check list of the simple day’s events, or if it’s a life goal to be successful. Always having something to work towards and actually working towards it will give you feelings of accomplishment which can in turn make you happier.
-REALIZE THAT YOU HAVE ONLY ONE LIFE - I feel like this can't be said enough. The only thing you can count on in life, the one thing that is for SURE to happen, is death. Don't dwell on this fact, for it may lead some of you to become sad and upset. Instead, spin this into making each day of your life as positive and fulfilling as possible. In my opinion, the way to get the most out of your life is through continuous happiness.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
In addition to the above points, here's two key things in your life that you should follow that will let you live longer and smarter, and ultimately allow you to be happier.
DON'T BE STUPID - Measure the risk/reward of what you're about to do. Is what you're about to do going to have a high risk for getting you in trouble? Getting you hurt? Hurting someone else? Is it worth the possible reward that can follow? These are questions you should ask yourself before doing anything with potentially large negative consequences.
EVERYTHING IN MODERATION - Smoking weed is great, right? Good - keep it at a few times a month maximum. Exercise is great, right? It IS possible to exercise too much. Don't do that. Playing WoW is great, right? So is having a healthy life with social interactions that involves doing fun things outside of the basement. Work is great, right? Doesn't it make you money? Don't get caught up in greed and let it take over your life. Make sure you realize that your priority shouldn't be making as much money as humanly possible. It will not make you a happier person.
If you disgaree with anything above, let me know. If you have something I'm forgetting (because I know I am) let me know.
Let me premise this by saying all of this information is based on personal experience, whether by careful observation of myself or of others.
I'm one of the happiest people I know. I feel happy nearly all the time regardless of the situation. I try to stick to the following (in no particular order):
-DON'T STRESS - Stress sucks. If you're getting caught up in something, take a step back, take a breath, and think of an organized way to handle the situation. This also involves avoiding situations which could cause you potential stress. AVOID procrastination at all costs! It adds up to subtle stress when you don't even realize it, and most often stress can make you unhappy. Prioritize your life appropriately. Is eating that hamburger worth the 5 minutes of bliss even though it makes you late to your interview for a job that could make you much happier? Reduce stress further by planning out what you have to do in order of priority and then actually do it.
-EXERCISE - Seriously. Do this. I've had some bummed out days and then I remind myself that if I head out for a run or go lift at the gym I'll feel significantly better. And I do. Incapable of exercising? Unless you're a quadriplegic, or have some other incapacitating disorder, you're not. Get out and MOVE.
-SLEEP - This is FUNDAMENTAL. I don't even like sleeping that much, but I don't like *anything* if I don't get my sleep. Not only am I less happy on days when I sleep less than 7 hours, but I feel so sluggish, my decision making is impacted as well as my focus, and my memory isn't that great. Sleep 8+ hours as often as you can. You'll feel more aware during the day, more energized, and happier. Most importantly, DO NOT get less than 7 hours of sleep for many days in a row. You'll feel like utter shit, and even after a night of good sleep, you may not even feel that great the next day until you get another night of good sleep. Try to keep a healthy sleep pattern and try to keep it consistent. To you non-sleepers, I recommend this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xmgNLrvW-94 (Part of a 2 part series, yes it's not very exciting)
Do you take prescription drugs for sleep? STOP! The health risks for excessive use of sleep aid etc can be detrimental. Try to get yourself as relaxed as possible before going to bed and clear your mind. Exercising during the day can allow you to fall asleep faster and have a more fulfilling sleep.
-AVOID EXCESSIVE DRUGS - When you get high you feel *great* don't you? Understandable. When you get high multiple times a day (or even multiple times a week) ask yourself if it legitimately makes you happy. But then ask yourself if you even remember all the shit you do, and if the next day you feel your fullest. Do you think you get great high sleep? You don't if you get high before going to bed consecutively each night. Your REM sleep is impacted which makes for a less fulfilling sleep and you'll be less aware during the next day which can also have a negative effect on your happiness. This is really difficult to see from your own perspective unless you take a step back and view your life from an outside perspective. Are you thinking clearly in stoner mode? No. Pot makes you think you're thinking clearly. It also makes you think you're good at things when really the tasks at hand would be performed more quickly and efficiently when you're sober. We've all heard "Dude, i'm so much better at that shit when I'm high!" No. Also avoid excessive drinking. I think this one is obvious. Alcohol doesn't necessarily make you happy, it simply alters your state of perception and magnifies a few emotions. Of course it's possible to be happy while under the influence of alcohol, but keep your drinking limited and infrequent. Avoid hard drugs with addictive properties such as coke, meth, and heroin. This is obvious. Avoid overuse of prescription drugs. Drugs such as these also have addictive properties and can be potentially problematic in the future (therefore impacting your happiness). VERY few of you have legitimate "illnesses" if you will, which require you to have prescription drugs. Try your best to avoid them. As for cigarettes, if you must, keep them infrequent. Not only does it give you a nicer buzz if you're not a smoker, but it's overall better for your health, and by extension, your future happiness. We've all heard about the risks of smoking and how it's not good for you. To you smokers who may want to quit, I recommend this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TL2Vh7goJc
-DON'T GIVE A FUCK - Don't take this too literally. What it means to say is "Don't take the opinions of others too critically." Is someone shitting on your day and it's bumming you out? Remove them from your life, and push them out of your mind. This is quite a difficult skill to possess, but a very helpful one. The ability to block out certain things that bother you has many strengths and few weaknesses. It allows you to strengthen the other points in your life that make you happy while removing the points in your life that make you unhappy.
-DO THINGS - Do you sit around all day playing WoW? Are you *legitimately* happy doing that? If you are, well then continue doing so. If not, get the fuck out of your house and go places. Meet people. See things. Don't have money? Get a job so you can do things. Mixing up your life is one way to make it significantly more exciting and it will yield more happiness.
-LIVE A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE - Stay hydrated; drink multiple cups of water each day. In time you will be able to feel what it’s like to be hydrated. Drinking water helps keep you alert and aware and it’s good for your body. Eat healthy. Just like what is mentioned below, in the extreme case in the movie SuperSize me, excessive consumption of fatty foods can lead to depression. It’s a good idea to take a multivitamin and you can get a shitload of the best multivitamins from cosco (a study found that they have the best) for very cheap. Eat breakfast. Eating a mix of fruits and vegetables amongst your diet can be greatly helpful. “Bananas have more Vitamin B6 than any other fresh fruit and are regarded as an excellent source of this vitamin. Eating bananas helps to keep serotonin levels high, which will keep you in good spirits.” - http://www.medkb.com. Keep good hygiene! Not only will being clean (hopefully) give you a more clean feel-good feeling, but it will make you a more approachable person.
-GET MOTIVATED - Always try to have a goal in mind. Whether it’s writing out a check list of the simple day’s events, or if it’s a life goal to be successful. Always having something to work towards and actually working towards it will give you feelings of accomplishment which can in turn make you happier.
-REALIZE THAT YOU HAVE ONLY ONE LIFE - I feel like this can't be said enough. The only thing you can count on in life, the one thing that is for SURE to happen, is death. Don't dwell on this fact, for it may lead some of you to become sad and upset. Instead, spin this into making each day of your life as positive and fulfilling as possible. In my opinion, the way to get the most out of your life is through continuous happiness.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
In addition to the above points, here's two key things in your life that you should follow that will let you live longer and smarter, and ultimately allow you to be happier.
DON'T BE STUPID - Measure the risk/reward of what you're about to do. Is what you're about to do going to have a high risk for getting you in trouble? Getting you hurt? Hurting someone else? Is it worth the possible reward that can follow? These are questions you should ask yourself before doing anything with potentially large negative consequences.
EVERYTHING IN MODERATION - Smoking weed is great, right? Good - keep it at a few times a month maximum. Exercise is great, right? It IS possible to exercise too much. Don't do that. Playing WoW is great, right? So is having a healthy life with social interactions that involves doing fun things outside of the basement. Work is great, right? Doesn't it make you money? Don't get caught up in greed and let it take over your life. Make sure you realize that your priority shouldn't be making as much money as humanly possible. It will not make you a happier person.
If you disgaree with anything above, let me know. If you have something I'm forgetting (because I know I am) let me know.
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